Carrie-Anne Moss 'instantly got sick' when she found out she got the part of Trinity in 'The Matrix'
Carrie-Anne Moss has lived many lives. At 30, she got her big break opposite Keanu Reeves as Trinity, the sunglasses-wearing, gun-toting badass who fought the evils of a simulated reality in "The Matrix." In her 40s, she scaled down her workload so she could raise her three kids. Now in her 50s and with her kids off to college, Moss is back on our screens, making a dramatic appearance as a Jedi knight in the "Star Wars" Disney+ series "The Acolyte" and starring opposite Arnold Schwarzenegger in the second season of his Netflix series "FUBAR."
But she still holds her breakout role close — so close that she almost turned on "The Matrix" on a recent plane trip to Los Angeles.
"I seriously almost watched it, but I didn't want anyone on the plane to think I was watching it to watch myself," Moss told Business Insider. "I just love the story."
While she ended up watching her former costar Reeves kick butt in "John Wick" instead, Moss still cherishes the opportunity to revisit the famous Wachowski sisters movie.
"'The Matrix' is one of those movies where, as you grow in your thinking, it becomes something different," Moss continued. "There is so much in it that I know I haven't received yet in terms of storytelling."
These days, Moss isn't just poring over her old movies in search of new meaning. Returning to acting in earnest now that her children are older has given her a newfound sense of enjoyment for the craft and the experience.
That's especially true of her time on "FUBAR." As the East German spy Greta, Moss not only puts on an accent, but gets to play a juicy arc as a villain — one who kisses Schwarzenegger's character in their first meeting. The role was reinvigorating.
"I love working and love so many of the jobs that I've done, but that wouldn't be how I would describe them," Moss said. "Having a job for the first time where I can say, 'That was so much fun,' it makes me want to do more."
In the latest interview in Business Insider's "Role Play" series, Moss reminisces about about her years as a struggling actor, getting pulled over while nursing her baby, and the moment when the "Memento" script finally clicked.
Business Insider: Let's take it back to the '90s. You're landing a few roles, most notably on the "Melrose Place" spinoff series, "Models Inc." What are you doing in that time to just pay the bills, pay the rent, and get by before the big break?
Carrie-Anne Moss: I waited tables a little bit when I first came out. I was a model when I was first breaking into acting, so I made a little bit of money doing that. And then I would get little parts that would just make me enough money to get to the next one.
I didn't know about paying taxes, so when I got that tax bill, I was like, "Oh, no! What do you mean?" I was in acting class, I was going to the gym, didn't have many friends, I would make friends on the treadmill, just becoming an adult. I was pretty innocent, naive, and very excited about living this dream that I had had my whole life. LA was so amazing then.
Tell me about the moment you learned you got the role of Trinity in "The Matrix."
I screen tested for it. I did all these different auditions to get to the final screen test, which was with Keanu [Reeves]. And it was on my 30th birthday. I met Keanu that day and felt very comfortable with him. He was very kind. I was very nervous. I mean, there was so much riding on it. You have to sign your contract before you go into the screen test, so you already know that if you get it how much you're going to get paid.
So that just builds more pressure.
Yeah, and I kind of didn't expect to get it. But at the same time, I had gone through so many times thinking I wasn't going to get to the next level, and then I got to the next level. So I do the screen test, and then they had a week to decide if they are going to book you. I knew the deadline was a Friday, so the whole week, when my phone rang, you're just wondering.
The Friday I was supposed to hear from my manager and my lawyer, they called and said, "They've asked for an extension. They've asked for another week." And I was like, "Oh, god!" So by the next Friday, I had totally let it go, to be honest. It wasn't on my mind like it had been the week before.
They called me, and everyone was on the phone, and they told me I got it, and I remember I instantly got sick. I remember that distinctly — I literally felt a head cold. I think I was holding so much stress, I was crying, and I was so happy, and got sick. I remember getting off the phone with them, and I didn't even know how to tell anyone. It was a surreal moment, almost too much.
You did "Memento" after "The Matrix," and that's another movie where you can discover things the more times you watch it. When you first read the script, did you understand it?
My manager is the one who really wanted me to read that. I was reading it, and I was intrigued, but it does take quite a few reads. And I remember, even after reading it a couple times, I didn't fully get it.
But when I got to that scene where Natalie turns on Leonard — I remember the big splurge I did for myself after "The Matrix" was I bought myself a lawn chair so I could lay down and read scripts out in the sun. It was a serious splurge — and I remember lying on it and reading that moment in the script and feeling, "Oh. My. God." I just felt I had to do that scene. I knew right then and there. There are other layers to why I wanted to do the movie, but so many years later, that still stands out.
I like these characters and these moments where I would never ever have anything like that in my life. There's such freedom in a character that would do that. You can't play that wrong, really. She is so diabolical in that moment, she's so horrible and so nasty. So to be that manipulative and go in there and do that to him like that. I just felt that would be so incredibly fun to do.
"Disturbia" is such a great thriller, and you played the mom of Shia LaBeouf's character. Off set, did you feel that same dynamic with him?
Not so much. I had just had my second baby, and I was not really that open to working at that particular moment. I had a 2-year-old and a new baby. I remember my team at the time going, "We really think you should do this." And very rarely did they do that; they really respected my need for being home.
I do feel motherly to younger actors now, but back then, I didn't feel that. I really liked Shia and thought he was really talented and cared a great deal about him, but I didn't feel like that.
You were literally feeling motherly to your own child.
Yeah. I was wondering, how I am going to do this?
Was your baby on set with you?
Yeah. We shot that in LA. I remember getting pulled over on the freeway, nursing him in his car seat at night while I had someone driving me. He was crying so hard to be fed. I was crying. I was thinking, I can't do this. But you figure it out. I did not get a ticket. I was crying, and the baby was crying. I think the cop was just like, "You need to go home." And I was like, "I know!"
After "Disturbia," was that the time when you decided to focus more on being a mother than acting?
Oh, yeah. I think I had my first child after doing "The Matrix." I think for the premiere of the second one, I was pregnant.
It all changed. I was one of those people who didn't even want anyone else to hold my baby. It was all encompassing. It was feeding me so much that it wasn't like I made any kind of mental decision. I actually, physically, couldn't do the work. And I didn't have a built-in support system, and I didn't want it. So when I worked after I had kids, it was, "Can I get help?" So that was really hard.
And it sounds so corny, but I would get offers and think about it, especially when my kids were really young, I just thought, at the end of my life, am I going to care that I did another movie or if I held my baby? It was a no-brainer. I have to say I lost a lot of my ambition for the business.
But now that the kids have grown, has the drive returned?
Yeah, totally different. I don't know if you have ever seen that movie "Searching for Debra Winger." I watched it again recently, and what Debra Winger said is that there's a season for everything. There's a season to be a struggling actor and eating chips and salsa and a little bit of sushi and having enough money to have a coffee — I mean, that was my life. I wasn't going on vacation. I worked a lot because I never went anywhere. So when everyone went home at Thanksgiving, I would get the job. I couldn't afford a plane ticket home. You have your very focused and driven time of really wanting it and fighting for it, and then, for me, a change happened when I had kids.
I remember when I went to do "Jessica Jones," it was very jarring. I went to work in New York, and I was commuting a lot, and I literally felt like I didn't even know how to talk to people. I didn't know how to do Uber. Krysten Ritter had to show me how to do it. I mean, going to set and everyone having phones, that was a real culture shock for me. You're doing a take, and the dolly grip is on his phone. It was like, "When did this happen?"
It's great to see you working more. You were fantastic in the brief time you were on "The Acolyte." Was it explained to you, going into taking the role, that you would die in the first six minutes of the first episode?
Yes. [Show creator] Leslye [Headland] really pitched that to me that she really wanted me to do this because she wanted it to be believable.
Did you like that idea?
I didn't really think about it. I think the reaction to it from the fans, I kind of thought, "Wow, how did I not think of that?"
What was the first movie of yours that you showed your kids?
All of them have seen "The Matrix" at a certain age.
Did you introduce it to them, or did they come to you and say they wanted to see it?
Yeah, it wasn't like, "Hey, I really want to screen a movie for you." They knew it, maybe their friends talked about it. This was by the time they were 12 or 13. All their friends came over, and I made popcorn, and all the moms approved; it was a big thing. I remember when my oldest saw it for the first time, the look of shock on his face because I was the mom who said, "Don't use that stick as a gun, we don't play with guns in this house." [Laughs.] That made me really laugh.
When your kids realize you had a whole life that they have no idea —like, "Who is that person?" — that's how it should be. Your kids should be the center of their own world. I've always been very sensitive to that. Kids who have parents who are actors, it's often their parents are the center of attention, they get a lot of attention when they are out in the world. I always stepped back and didn't want that for them.
This interview has been condensed and edited for clarity.
"FUBAR" season two is now streaming on Netflix.
Patricia Clarkson's biggest career regret? Losing out on a role in 'Big.'
Jason Isaacs explains what he thinks happened to the Ratliffs after they left the White Lotus
Joining the MCU was the best business decision Elizabeth Olsen ever made
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