'Dry begging' is a toxic relationship habit you might be guilty of. Therapists say it is more common than you think
Relationships are often seen as a delicate dance of communication, compromise, and emotional attunement. But sometimes, what seems like a harmless comment or a casual hint can quietly chip away at that foundation. Enter
dry begging
—a subtle, passive-aggressive behavior that relationship therapists are now sounding the alarm over.
A new buzzword for an old behavior
While you won't find
dry begging
in any formal psychology textbook just yet, the term is quickly gaining traction online and in therapy rooms alike. Popularized in part by UK-based counselor Darren Magee through his viral YouTube explanation, the phrase describes a pattern of passive emotional manipulation—usually involving guilt-tripping or indirect demands—without any direct communication.
Imagine hearing: 'I guess I'll just do all the laundry this week' or 'Most people would be happy their partner does this.' On the surface, these might sound like small grievances. But according to Magee, they're classic signs of dry begging—using emotional cues instead of clear language to make your partner feel obligated.
by Taboola
by Taboola
Sponsored Links
Sponsored Links
Promoted Links
Promoted Links
You May Like
Grow and build next-gen AI skills with BITS Pilani.
BITS Pilani WILP
Apply Now
Undo
Guilt as currency, not communication
Magee explains that dry begging often involves exploiting
emotional signals
or subtle vulnerability to elicit action or sympathy. The result? One partner ends up shouldering unspoken burdens while the other avoids uncomfortable honesty.
'Dry begging operates by exploiting social cues and emotional signals rather than making direct requests,' Magee notes. 'It's aimed at creating a sense of obligation in others.'
You Might Also Like:
What is 'submarining'? A toxic dating trend making a comeback. How to spot it before it hurts you
And that obligation can come at a steep emotional cost. In a report from
UNILAD
, relationship therapist Hope Kelaher warns that this pattern of interaction, if left unchecked, could spiral into deeper issues like mistrust, emotional withdrawal, and ultimately, relationship breakdown.
Not just annoying—potentially damaging
Kelaher emphasizes that strong relationships rely on vulnerability and open dialogue. 'Taking a passive-aggressive stance is the exact opposite,' she explains. 'In worst-case scenarios, I've seen it lead to
communication breakdown
, increased conflict, and the end of a relationship.'
The concern is not just that people are using dry begging—but that many don't even realize they're doing it. On Reddit, where Magee's video has sparked heated conversations, users shared relatable experiences of past relationships marred by such veiled emotional tactics.
One user summed it up: 'I never knew there was a word for it. But looking back, that behavior killed the trust in our relationship.'
You Might Also Like:
Is ChatGPT fueling breakups? How AI relationship advice may be sparking delusions and destroying real connections
Honesty beats hints
While dry begging may not be as overtly damaging as shouting matches or betrayal, experts warn that its quiet toxicity can be just as destructive over time. It's a gentle reminder that clear, compassionate communication—no matter how awkward—will always be healthier than weaponized guilt.
So the next time you feel tempted to say, 'I guess I'll do it since no one else will,' consider pausing. Ask for what you need. You may be surprised at how much stronger your relationship becomes.
You Might Also Like:
'Floodlighting' is the new dating trend Gen Z can't stop talking about. But why is it a red flag experts are warning against?
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
Time of India
41 minutes ago
- Time of India
Horoscope Today, June 23, 2025: Daily Predictions Based on Your Chinese Zodiac Sign
Welcome to your daily Chinese horoscope, where we explore the mystical insights of the Chinese zodiac. Each day brings new opportunities and challenges, shaped by the powerful dynamics of the Chinese zodiac signs and the ongoing Chinese zodiac year. Discover what the stars have in store for you based on your specific zodiac sign in this ancient astrology tradition. Horoscope Today for Rat Zodiac (1948, 1960, 1972, 1984, 1996, 2008, 2020) A new beginning starts today—if only you would let go of the restraints. At work, release the idea you have been keeping to yourself. In love, speak the language of your heart. Finance-wise, make that initial baby step you have been putting off. Health-wise, make that change you have been procrastinating about. Fear whispers while your heart quite loudly knows it is the right time. The moment you let go of this lingering doubt, new energy will flow in. Letting go means actually letting something better come to life. Horoscope Today for Ox Zodiac (1949, 1961, 1973, 1985, 1997, 2009, 2021) Even the smallest change to your routine may bring immense relief today. At work, adjust your schedule a little for better performance. In love, break the old mould for a while—surprise your partner. Finance-wise, explore other ways to simplify matters. by Taboola by Taboola Sponsored Links Sponsored Links Promoted Links Promoted Links You May Like Monitor Temperature Easily [Get Started] Warehouse Temperature | Search Ads Read More Undo One for health: freshen up your way even if it involves only a stretch in the morning. Your mind now is begging for this little reset. New energy is nothing to do with that big leap but comes from purposefully revitalizing the old. Horoscope Today for Tiger Zodiac (1950, 1962, 1974, 1986, 1998, 2010, 2022) The inner voice is whispering to guide you—listen to it today. In work, act on anything that feels right. In love, go with your gut over logic. For money, heed that peaceful voice within, which also knows what to reject. For health, pay attention to what the body keeps whispering. You don't need a complete set of answers right now. Just take that next step that feels right, and the way will open. Horoscope Today for Rabbit Zodiac (1951, 1963, 1975, 1987, 1999, 2011, 2023) Today, do not react right away. The immediate reaction will only bring you pain later on. At work, give yourself some time before responding. In love, breathe deeply before you say anything driven by emotion. When dealing with money, think twice before acting on impulse. As far as health goes, calm your mind before proceeding. Gentle pausing will lead to better clarity, and one does not have to respond right away-the stillness will protect the soul better than any word ever could. Horoscope Today for Dragon Zodiac (1940, 1952, 1964, 1976, 1988, 2000, 2012, 2024) Every 'no' you give forms an avenue for the right 'yes' to come along on another day. For work, don't take on what drains you. In love, set some gentle boundaries. Financially, say no to anything that doesn't sit well with you. For health, say yes to rest and no to pressure. You do not really need to please everyone. Saying 'No' is not rejection; it's just redirection. Guard your time energy now. The right opportunities will come, when there is room. Horoscope Today for Snake Zodiac (1941, 1953, 1965, 1977, 1989, 2001, 2013) You're very determined, but today try to notice where persistence turns to pressure. For work, step back when your effort feels forced. In love, do not seek to force connection; allow it to breathe. Financially, pause before strongly insisting on results. For health, diminish tension by easing off a little. Knowing when to stop is power. Flow over force. What is meant for you with less struggle will be eased. Trust in time. Horoscope Today for Horse Zodiac (1942, 1954, 1966, 1978, 1990, 2002, 2014) Choose humility today by treading on a quiet path to success. Let someone else work the show in the glare of limelight while you stay back in comfort, for work. Admit it with your loved ones when you are wrong; this builds a solid trust bond. The simple, steady way is your financial choice today. From a health point of view, choose rest over proving you can go the distance. This little step back today will lead to great rewards in the future. Genuine confidence knows when it should lead and when it should listen. Be grounded. Horoscope Today for Goat Zodiac (1943, 1955, 1967, 1979, 1991, 2003, 2015) You've been listening to many voices; your own is the most important. Work will persuade you to trust your own instinct before anything else. In love, listen to your feelings. Financially, go with what feels balanced to you. For health, listen to what your body is quietly suggesting. Advice is something good to have, but is not always right for you. You know more than you realize. Self-trust will clearly guide you today. Horoscope Today for Monkey Zodiac (1944, 1956, 1968, 1980, 1992, 2004, 2016) Today, let your softness stand as your strength. Speak with calm honesty for respect at work. Show love with care, not afraid of it being too soft. With finance, keep clear and quiet. Nurture your body in health and don't push. Being soft does not mean being weak. It means you know when to flow and when to stop. Your softness can dislodge what force cannot. Trust in it. Horoscope Today for Rooster Zodiac (1945, 1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, 2005, 2017) Your feelings are signals—not orders. At work, notice how you feel, but keep your balance. In love feel, but don't come too quickly to conclusions. Financially eff emotion before spending. In health, emotions should guide you, not rule you: Emotions are like weather; they pass, but they tell you something. Use them to understand, not to decide. Let the heart speak, but gently guide it with the mind. Horoscope Today for Dog Zodiac (1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006, 2018) You are still learning, and that makes all the difference. Be gentle on yourself today. In work, let mistakes be your growth. In love, forgive yourself for not knowing all. Financially, learn through every small step. In health, forgive yourself if you stray from your routine. Progress is messy. There is no need to rush your healing or path. Gentle is what you need for doing your best. Horoscope Today for Pig Zodiac (1947, 1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007, 2019) If the present feels slow or stuck, end your worries there because a breakthrough is near. At work, pauses will lead to new ideas. In love, quiet time unveils emotional clarity. In finance, slow pace keeps you from making mistakes. Concerning health, rest revitalizes. Most often the still moments bring transformations in life. Don't fear the slow pace; it's that pace that is birthed with insight, growth, and magic into the world. Discover everything about astrology at the Times of India , including daily horoscopes for Aries , Taurus , Gemini , Cancer , Leo , Virgo , Libra , Scorpio , Sagittarius , Capricorn , Aquarius , and Pisces .
Time of India
2 hours ago
- Time of India
Air India crash aftermath: Broken hearts & empty homes; a husband who hasn't cried, an elderly who won't go home
AHMEDABAD: Eleven days after the London-bound AI 171 crashed in Ahmedabad, victims' families continue to struggle with overwhelming grief, with many displaying unexpected reactions to trauma that has left counsellors concerned. One of the most heartbreaking cases is a 27-year-old man who lost his wife and has been unable to cry even once. The couple had married in 2024, and he had flown ahead to set up their new home in London. "I should have been with her," the guilt-ridden man has been telling himself repeatedly, too traumatised to come to terms with the loss. During their last conversation, his wife had told him repeatedly not to get delayed and keep her waiting at London's Gatwick airport. "So, when he received news of the crash, he took the first available flight and reached Ahmedabad, rebuking himself for getting late. He visited the (hospital) campus for three days to complete procedures and take home her remains for last rites. He did not cry, could not cry rather, even once," said a counsellor at Civil Hospital, Ahmedabad. Hospital authorities have appointed 10 counsellors - primarily experienced psychiatrists - to help families cope with the deaths of loved ones. by Taboola by Taboola Sponsored Links Sponsored Links Promoted Links Promoted Links You May Like 5 Books Warren Buffett Wants You to Read In 2025 Blinkist: Warren Buffett's Reading List Undo Urvika Parekh, one of the counsellors, recounted breaking the news to a seven-year-old girl. "She had come to give DNA samples for identification of remains. The family could not break the news to her. Some families have lost multiple family members. The void is hard to fill," Parekh said. The counsellors have encountered several instances of families unable to return to normal lives. A senior citizen who lost four family members has not gone back home. "The emptiness of the house is too overwhelming for him, so he has been staying with a close relative for the time being. The same is true for several families as they have just held the last rites of their dear ones and are now finding it difficult to envision life without them," she said. Parekh explained the seven stages of grief - shock and denial, pain and guilt, anger and bargaining, depression, the upward turn, reconstruction, and acceptance. Disha Vasavada, another psychiatrist and counsellor said, "It is tougher to cope with the loss of a child than a parent. In many instances, it may take days or weeks to process the trauma." The counsellors will stay in touch with families. "Some relatives gained composure initially but could not hold themselves back when the coffins were handed over. The first few days were spent making arrangements, but when reality sets in, hand-holding is necessary," she said. The psychiatrists drew parallels with early Covid deaths, where relatives were not allowed to see the deceased one last time, causing dissonance for those seeking closure.
Time of India
3 hours ago
- Time of India
Residential PU colleges tackle screen addiction with smart techniques
Mangaluru: The residential PU colleges in coastal districts are adopting a series of steps to tackle screen addiction among newly admitted students, many of whom have grown dependent, especially during the Covid-19 years. The district attracts students for pre-university education from several states and even NRIs. While there are day scholars, thousands of students complete their courses staying in residential facilities, where owning and using mobile phones are strictly prohibited. The students who used mobile phones until their grade 10, for the next two years, connect with their families only through landline phones or face-to-face meetings. "Suddenly detaching from the gadgets, which were part and parcel of their daily life until grade 10, and sticking only to books is a huge transformation for these young minds. The college does not permit owning mobile phones. At our college, considering their urge, a few months ago, we introduced tabs. However, they are used for educational purposes only," said NK Vijayan Karippal, principal of Expert College, Valachil. by Taboola by Taboola Sponsored Links Sponsored Links Promoted Links Promoted Links You May Like Perdagangkan CFD Emas dengan Broker Tepercaya IC Markets Mendaftar Undo Another college principal of a residential school agrees with Vijayan and adds that this gadget addiction can be detached from individuals by keeping them busy academically and with other activities. Mohammed Sadakath, principal of Alva's PU College, said the majority of them are addicted to mobile phones. "However, we have a strict policy on no mobile usage on campus. In my experience, it takes at least a month to come out of the need for mobile phones among these young minds," Sadakath said. To ease withdrawal-like symptoms, some colleges have introduced controlled alternatives like academic tablets, while others permit monitored online access via desktops strictly for educational use. A spokesperson for Excellent PU College, Moodbidri, said they allow the use of desktops and their browsing activities are monitored. Dinesh M Kodavoor, principal of Jnanasudha PU College, Karkala, said they filter out students through their entrance exam. "If a student is academically excellent, it is naturally understood that he/she has kept away from gadgets and is a serious candidate," he said. "We also advise our parents whose children are day scholars to keep a watch on their ward's screen time." Colleges also said some parents enrol their wards in residential colleges with the sole purpose of reducing gadget addiction, and academics come second.
