Dear Mike White, look no further. This is where you should film the next season of ‘White Lotus.'

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The living room area of a tent at the Mahali Mzuri safari camp.
Christopher Muther/Globe Staff
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The Sir Richard Branson Mahali Mzuri Virgin Mega Safari Camp features a swimming pool, a bar, and a dining room, where a chef prepares multi-course, restaurant-quality meals for an eclectic mix of guests. Between the unbridled opulence of it all and the mix of guests, I immediately knew that this stylishly-appointed camp is where season four of HBO's 'The White Lotus' should be filmed.
Listen carefully, Mike White. I broke my pledge of not working on vacation to tell you that your show
needs
a safari season, and Sir Richard Branson's quaint camp is the obvious setting. You don't even need to give me creative credit, but I certainly wouldn't refuse it.
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The dining area at the Mahali Mzuri safari camp in Kenya.
Christopher Muther/Globe Staff
The
The mix of guests at Mahali Mzuri during my stay could easily translate to the small screen. I was traveling with a group of seven gay men from Boston (a.k.a. the drama). There was a honeymooning second-marriage couple from South Carolina (cue the Parker Posey accent), a large family from Hawaii celebrating a non-descript and unspoken milestone (suspicious), a solo traveler enjoying her birthday (sad), and a pair of young couples from Southeast Asia who had a wardrobe better suited for Coachella than Kenya. The script writes itself. Heck, I'm happy to help, for a small fee, of course.
The pool area at Mahali Mzuri safari camp overlooks a valley where guests can watch animals such as giraffes, elephants, hippos, and baboons stroll through.
Christopher Muther/Globe Staff
I'll give you an anecdote for free, and you can decide if it works for 'White Lotus Kenya.' My friends and I visited a traditional Maasai village near the camp to see how the locals live, except this village had more handicrafts for sale than residents. Now, picture a group of gay men sitting inside a traditional mud hut listening to a local describe how the huts are constructed. Before he could finish, an elderly woman from the tribe had a question for us: 'Where are your wives?'
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Did I mention that homosexuality is illegal in Kenya? This is comedy gold, Mike White.
It's not just the culture that works for 'White Lotus.' There's also room for danger. A month before our arrival, a lion killed a 14-year-old girl at a camp in Kenya, and while we were on a safari, a lion killed a man in Namibia when he stepped out of his tent in the night to use the toilet. On our twice-daily safari rides through the conservancies, we frequently saw lions gnawing on freshly killed prey. Think of the possibilities of killing off a character by mauling.
A pair of giraffes keeps watch for predators at the Maasai Mazari National Reserve in Kenya.
Christopher Muther/Globe Staff
The beautiful locations are part of the 'White Lotus' television-as-travel brochure appeal, and the 580-square-mile Maasai Mara National Reserve, where Sir Richard Branson's Mahali Mzuri Virgin Mega Safari Camp is located, is breathtaking. Each evening, the sunset was like a painting, and the sheer amount of wildlife was impressive. Throughout the trip, our group stayed at three different camps. They were all notable in their own way, but even the wildlife around Mahali Mzuri seemed more extravagant. Were they on Branson's payroll?
Are you picking up what I'm putting down here, Mike? I think we've got a hit on our hands.
Two of the 12 tents at the luxury Mahali Mzuri safari camp. The tents are stretched over steel supports.
Christopher Muther/Globe Staff
You can even draw upon our wacky experiences of occasional power outages, an actual spear being used as a 'Do not disturb' sign, and a policy that allows guests to step behind the bar and mix their own drinks if there's no bartender in sight. Those three elements alone can serve as a story arc.
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It may sound surprising that I knew so little about Mahali Mzuri before I arrived, but since my job involves planning travel, I was happy to leave the planning to others for my vacation. I just showed up with a duffle bag of what I thought were appropriate safari clothes and prepared to rough it. Little did I know I'd wind up in such glamorous surroundings.
That's my pitch, Mike. I know you're looking at setting the new season
Even if you don't use my idea — and you'd be crazy not to — I won't hold it against you. I'll always have the memories of the luxury, the lions, and the local woman asking a large group of gay men why we left our wives at home.
Staff prepare the restaurant for diners at the Mahali Mzuri safari camp in Kenya.
Christopher Muther/Globe Staff
An outdoor table is set for an evening dinner party at the opulent Mahali Mzuri safari camp.
Christopher Muther/Globe Staff
Christopher Muther can be reached at

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CBS News

32 minutes ago

• CBS News

This week on "Sunday Morning" (June 22)

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Geek Tyrant

an hour ago

• Geek Tyrant

James Gunn Defends Matt Reeves Amid THE BATMAN: PART II Delays: 'People Should Get Off Matt's Nuts" — GeekTyrant

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Los Angeles Times

2 hours ago

• Los Angeles Times

With ‘The Rehearsal,' Nathan Fielder needs his own Emmy category

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