Prosecco is bargain-basement gold for Aussies craving alternative to pricey champagne, even if it's geared for lowly 'commoners' like us
There is no polite way to say this: If you drink prosecco you are common.
It may sound snobbish to say so, but if you drink prosecco instead of champagne it is a sure sign you are low class.
So says William Hanson, a British authority of etiquette.
It makes no difference to Mr Hanson that more than 700 million bottles of prosecco are sold every year and that it is the bargain-basement alternative to champagne.
Mr Hanson seems to care not that prosecco also adds the frothy pop charm to the Aperol spritz, the world's most ubiquitous cocktail.
In Mr Hanson's eyes, I must be a low-class vulgarian because I rather enjoy a good prosecco, especially with a fiery Indian curry.
It's palate cleansing, and the sweetness cuts through the spice.
Mr Hanson is the author of the bestselling Just Good Manners (Penguin) described as the quintessential guide to etiquette.
He lists other tell-tale signs that you are common.
He dislikes large, wall-mounted televisions he says intrude on family life.
He loathes hot tubs, disapproves of liquid soap and frowns on ill-bred commoners who put on make-up in public and hold their knives like pens.
Mr Hanson sounds to me like those entitled, yet delightful high society English chaps from 'Brideshead Revisited' who dash around Chelsea and Knightsbridge saying 'righty-o'.
And he is certainly on the money with his views on hot tubs and giant TVs, is he not?
Mercifully, he grudgingly approves of prosecco being served at Italian-themed dinners 'because that's Italian champagne'.
'But if you really want champagne but you either can't afford it or there isn't any, that's when choosing prosecco becomes common,' he adds.
Prosecco is made from the glera grape native to the Veneto region in northeastern Italy.
And even there it is surrounded by a little snobbishness from the Italians themselves. Those with a more refined palate insist on posh 'prosecco superiore' bubbles.
You can recognise them by the labels with the words Conegliano Valdobbiadene Prosecco Superiore DOCG.
The Conegliano Valdobbiadene region's DOCG (Denominazione di Origine Controllata e Garantita) stamp is an assurance of quality.
It is the highest rating any wine appellation can get from Italy's Ministry of Agriculture.
Producers have to run the gauntlet through a panel of experts to qualify.
Most 'prosecco superiore' grapes are grown in vineyards on such steep slopes so that it is too dangerous for mechanical harvesters.
So the grapes are picked by hand and carried uphill in buckets on a pulley system.
The Aperol spritz, meanwhile, is under siege in New York where bartenders are reportedly replacing the Aperol with Campari, its slightly bitter cousin.
The traditional Italian palate cleanser sgroppino is also rocketing up the cocktail hit parade.
Sgroppino (pronounced cro-PEEN-yoe) may be served as a cocktail or a slushy dessert.
It is a boozy frozen treat made with lemon sorbet, prosecco and vodka.
It was traditionally an after-dinner drink but is now served at brunch (heaven forbid!) alongside croissants and sweet tarts.
And if you don't have prosecco you can also make it with sparkling wine.
Add an orange wedge for a garnish.
Or try The Americano, a bitter, low alcohol spritz described as a classic riff on the Milano-Torino cocktail.
The Times reports it is a mix of simple mix of Campari (from Milan) and sweet vermouth (from Turin) created by Gaspare Campari at his Caffè Campari in the 1860s.
'When soda water was added, it became a hit among American tourists, hence the name.'
For a boozier version, add a nip of gin.
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