Latest news with #toxicrelationships
Wall Street Journal
19 hours ago
- Automotive
- Wall Street Journal
High Costs Have Ended America's Love Affair With Cars
I think of myself not so much as a car reviewer as an intimacy coordinator. Four out of five American households depend on an automobile to get to work, to get the kids to school, to go wherever. The typical driver spends about an hour a day in the car, says the AAA—more face time than many of us spend with our families. A good relationship starts with a good match. Lately, though, Americans have been losing that car-loving feeling. Actually, they're at the dish-throwing stage. Light-vehicle sales have fallen by about 1.7 million a year since 2016, reflecting the number of younger consumers declining the pleasures of ownership. Millions more remained trapped in toxic relationships with abusive elders. The average age of passenger cars on the road is currently 14.5 years, according to S&P Global's data.
Yahoo
a day ago
- General
- Yahoo
15 Risky Decisions That Will Haunt You When You're Older
Aging is a funny thing. It's like a time machine that whisks you forward and forces you to reckon with the choices you've made. Some decisions you can laugh about over wine, others may gnaw at you in the quiet of the night. Here are 15 risky decisions that might just come back to haunt you, the ones that demand introspection and perhaps a touch of regret. Education doesn't stop after formal schooling, yet many of us neglect ongoing learning in favor of more immediate pursuits. The world is ever-changing, and continuous learning could be the key to staying relevant and fulfilled. As you grow older, the opportunities missed for personal and professional development might start to weigh on you. The haunting realization is that knowledge could have opened doors you didn't even know existed. The regret is compounded by the awareness that it's never too late to learn, but now the climb seems steeper. Watching others thrive because they invested in their growth can serve as a constant reminder of what you didn't do. You might find yourself yearning for the insights and skills that could have been yours. And you'll wish you'd recognized the power of lifelong learning when it mattered. How often do we linger in toxic relationships because we're too afraid of the void they might leave behind? The idea of ripping off the Band-Aid seems daunting, so you stick around, hoping things will magically improve. But here's the harsh truth: allowing toxic people to sap your energy is a decision you'll kick yourself for later. Ask anyone who's survived it—they'll tell you that time spent on people who don't uplift you is time wasted. The years will pass, and what you'll remember isn't the comfort of the familiar, but the stagnation it brought. It's like being stuck in quicksand where every attempt to reach for better is stifled by their negativity. As the years roll by, you'll yearn for the courage to have cut ties sooner. And realize that peace was always just a decision away. There's something almost invincible about feeling young, like your body's a temple that you can graffiti all over without consequences. But the truth often hits you later—hard—when you realize those skipped dentist appointments and ignored aches are catching up. According to a study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association, untreated minor health issues in your 20s and 30s can evolve into major problems by the time you're 50. So those cavalier days of skipping check-ups might morph into a regretful reflection in the mirror, as you count the cost of negligence. The real kicker is that routine self-care often sounds unbearably mundane in your youthful years. Who wants to swap late-night adventures for early morning jogs or trade pizza for kale? The reality check comes later when you're left with a body that feels older than its years. And you'll find yourself shaking your head, longing for a chance to whisper some wisdom into your younger self's ear. The allure of climbing the career ladder is undeniable, and there's a certain prestige that comes with those late nights at the office. But here's a sobering thought: no one on their deathbed ever wishes they'd spent more time at work. Research from Harvard Business School highlights a staggering number of professionals experiencing significant regret over imbalanced work-life priorities. The hard truth is, while promotions and paychecks are enticing, they're a poor substitute for memories and meaningful connections. Years down the line, when you're flipping through old photo albums, it's the family gatherings and spontaneous road trips that'll tug at your heartstrings—not the spreadsheets or client meetings. The risk here is that you might wake up one day and realize you've built a career but not much of a life. What seemed like ambition in your youth might echo as regret in your later years, leaving you to wonder if the trade-offs were truly worth it. There's a certain thrill in living for today, in cashing in your paycheck for instant gratification. But fast forward a few decades, and you'll be cursing your past self for not stashing away those dollars. Retirement may seem like an eternity away when you're young, but the future has a sneaky way of arriving sooner than expected. And suddenly, those splurges on non-essentials start to haunt you. The regret deepens when you see peers enjoying the fruits of their financial wisdom. They've got peace of mind, while you're scrambling to catch up, feeling the pressure of financial insecurity. This decision, once so trivial, becomes a looming ghost. It serves as a reminder that sometimes the most freeing choice is the one that feels like a sacrifice at the time. The world is a vast playground, but how often do we put off exploring it, thinking we'll have time later? According to travel expert Rick Steves, there's an undeniable enrichment that comes from seeing the world, something you can't replicate in textbooks or documentaries. Yet, many of us hesitate, citing work, finances, or responsibilities as barriers. Years later, the regret sinks in as you realize that the opportunity was there, ripe for the taking, and you let it pass by. Sure, traveling can feel like an extravagant indulgence, especially when you're young and funds are tight. But those who've done it will tell you it's an investment in your soul, one that pays dividends in perspective and joy. The places you didn't see, the cultures you didn't experience become a haunting reminder of a world half-lived. And that's a ghost that whispers softly, "You should have come." Comfort zones have a sneaky way of morphing into ruts without you even realizing it. We crave stability and safety, but too much of it can lead to a stagnant life. According to psychologist Dr. Carol Dweck, stepping out of your comfort zone is crucial for growth and fulfillment. Yet, too often, the fear of change keeps us tethered to what's familiar, and we wake up one day feeling unfulfilled and trapped. The rut becomes a prison of our own making, and the longer we stay, the harder it is to leave. You'll look back and see the missed opportunities for growth and the dreams that quietly faded into the background. The risk of staying put can leave you with a life unlived, haunting you with the possibilities you didn't pursue. And the regret is not just about what you did, but what you never dared to do. There's a seductive pull to short-term pleasures that often blinds us to the long-term goals we set for ourselves. The thrill of an impulsive purchase or the fleeting high of a night out can feel euphoric. But when those moments accumulate into a pattern, they can derail the bigger aspirations you once held dear. Years later, as you sit amidst the clutter of temporary satisfactions, you might wonder where all that time and money went. The haunting realization is that each small indulgence took you a step further from the dreams you shelved. While not all pleasures are detrimental, consistently choosing the short-term can leave you with a life that feels scattered and unanchored. The echoes of those choices will remind you of the sacrifices you made and the goals you compromised. And you'll find yourself yearning for a second chance to balance desire with discipline. We often let the fear of others' opinions shape our decisions, silencing our true desires. This fear becomes a shadow that follows you, influencing every choice, no matter how minor. Over time, you might realize that many of your life's decisions weren't truly yours, but rather a reflection of what you thought others wanted. It's a realization that comes with a sting—a life lived for others is rarely fulfilling. As you age, the weight of this becomes heavier, and the regret more palpable. The sad irony is that people are usually too caught up in their own lives to scrutinize ours as closely as we imagine. By allowing fear to dictate your path, you end up with a life that feels like an ill-fitting costume. And the haunting thought will be how different things could have been if you'd only listened to yourself. Pride and fear of vulnerability often keep us from reaching out when we need help the most. We assume independence is synonymous with strength, but this mindset can be isolating. In hindsight, you might see the times when a little support could have made all the difference. The reality is that everyone needs a helping hand now and then, and refusing it only prolongs struggle. The haunting regret here is rooted in the unnecessary suffering, the challenges that became harder because they were faced alone. Years down the line, you'll see the missed opportunities for connection and growth that come from asking for help. The courage to be vulnerable might have led to richer relationships and easier resolutions. And you'll wish you'd embraced the strength in admitting you couldn't do it all alone. Love's a tricky business, and the fear of being alone can lead us to settle for relationships that don't truly fulfill us. You might think you're being practical, but settling is a compromise that chips away at your soul bit by bit. Fast forward a few decades, and the decision to stay in a lukewarm relationship will feel like a weight around your heart. It's a decision that haunts you in the quiet moments, a constant reminder of what could have been. The regret is often not just about the love that didn't feel right, but about the love you never opened yourself up to. The realization that you could have held out for something more authentic, more passionate, can be a bitter pill to swallow. Settling in love leaves you contemplating a life half-lived, yearning for what you believe love should have been. And you'll find yourself longing for a chance to do it over, to choose differently, to choose better. We all have that inner voice, that gut feeling that guides us, yet how often do we ignore it? It's easy to be swayed by logic, by what seems rational and sensible on the surface. But as time goes on, you might find that ignoring your instincts leads you away from paths that were meant for you. That haunting, nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach becomes a testament to the choices you didn't make. The regret lingers because deep down, your inner voice often knows best—even when logic doesn't agree. You'll look back and see the opportunities missed, the roads not taken, all because you silenced that whisper of intuition. It becomes an echo of lost potential and dreams deferred. And you'll wish you'd trusted yourself more when it mattered. Friendships often take a backseat when life gets busy, overshadowed by work, family, and responsibilities. Yet these relationships are the threads that weave the tapestry of a fulfilling life. In the end, it's the friends you've nurtured who will stand by you, who'll be the keepers of your shared stories and laughter. The regret comes when you realize you didn't invest enough in these connections. Years later, you might find yourself feeling isolated, missing the camaraderie and support you took for granted. Those friendships you let drift away can become ghosts that haunt you, reminders of the support system you could have had. The realization that you didn't prioritize those bonds only hits harder with age. And you'll wish you'd known the true value of those friendships when you had the chance to nurture them. Perfectionism is a seductive trap, promising success and acceptance, yet delivering stress and anxiety. In the pursuit of perfect, you often miss the beauty of progress and the joy of the journey. As the years pass, you might find yourself with a list of accomplishments that feel hollow, tainted by the constant pressure you placed on yourself. The haunting realization is that perfection is unattainable, and in chasing it, you overlooked the growth and learning along the way. The regret is not just about what you didn't achieve, but how you achieved what you did. Those moments lost to stress and self-doubt can add up, leaving you wondering why you weren't kinder to yourself. With age, you begin to see that progress, no matter how imperfect, is where the real achievement lies. And you'll wish you'd celebrated the small wins instead of fixating on flawlessness. Fear is a cunning beast that masquerades as wisdom, whispering caution when what you need is boldness. The irony is that failure isn't life's greatest tragedy—it's the missed opportunities that could've led to success. In your later years, you'll look back at the risks you didn't take and realize that the safety net you clung to was more of a cage. It's a bitter pill to swallow, knowing your potential was stifled by nothing more than your own doubt. There's a stark difference between calculated risks and reckless abandon, and oftentimes, we err on the side of excessive caution. This hesitation can rob you of the breakthroughs that come from stepping into the unknown. As the years tally up, so too will the what-ifs, each a testament to chances not taken. And you'll wish you'd been a little braver, a little more daring, when the stakes were lower.
Yahoo
7 days ago
- Yahoo
Woman Cuts Off Mother and 'Golden Child' Brother After They Insult Her Toddler
A woman severed ties with her mom and brother over their comments about her young daughter The poster says her brother, whom she referred to as a "golden child," questioned her 2-year-old's manners and the size of her feet Their mom didn't intervene, and now the woman wants nothing to do with themA 30-year-old woman turned to Reddit after cutting off her mother and brother due to their rude behavior towards her 2-year-old daughter. The situation unfolded during a family visit where her brother, Mady, whom she describes as the 'golden child,' made several derogatory comments about her daughter. 'My daughter was having fun with her uncle Roy, and bonding when golden child, uncle Mady appeared after waking up midday," the woman recounts in her post. "Uncle Mady immediately started insulting my daughter, claiming that we hadn't taught her any manners.' His behavior was not only rude but also surprising, given that Mady had only met his niece a handful of times. 'He claims it is disrespectful for her to call Uncle Roy, 'Uncle Roy', and culturally, elders should not be called by their first name,' she writes. However, Mady's comments were not limited to general criticism, as he also made jabs about the child's appearance. 'My mom mentioned how a pair of shoes she had bought my daughter did not fit her. Mady started commenting on how big her feet were," the woman writes. 'He said, 'She has gigantic feet like her mother,' and then asked me, 'What are you, a size 20?' ' His comments crossed a line, prompting the woman to intervene and call her husband to pick them up. 'I was not going to sit and listen to my daughter, a toddler, getting insulted any longer,' she notes. Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. The situation escalated further when her husband confronted Mady about his behavior, which led to a heated exchange between the two men. Mady called them names, kicking them out of the house despite it being their parents' home. The woman's mother failed to address Mady's behavior. Instead, she defended him by saying his comments weren't that bad. In the aftermath of the incident, the woman and her husband cut off contact with her mother and Mady, while maintaining a relationship with her other brother, Roy. 'My mom did not call after the fact, but waited a week to call us, after my aunt spoke to her. She has now tried to call us once a week, which we have not answered, as we felt her efforts were bare minimum,' she adds. The poster reflects on her actions, seeking to understand if there was anything she could have done differently. 'I want to take accountability for my own role, and I want to find out if there is something I'm not seeing that I could have done differently,' she concludes. 'I want to do the best for my daughter.' Read the original article on People
Fast Company
13-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Fast Company
TikTok users are exposing their worst exes—all to the soundtrack of Lorde's new single
The latest TikTok trend has people exposing their terrible exes and most toxic relationship stories to Lorde's new single ' Man of the Year '—with receipts. Since the song dropped at the end of last month, the trend has quickly gained traction on TikTok. Typically following a slideshow format, users post a selfie before revealing a series of text messages or, worse, a voice note from truly the worst villains. While the trend fundamentally misinterprets the lyrics, which explore Lorde's gender identity, it has nonetheless opened Pandora's box online. One viral post, with almost five million views, shows someone scrolling through their ex-partner's unopened Snapchat messages from other women (they just keep coming). 'At least I was pinned,' the TikToker joked in the caption. 'That looks exhausting. is he unemployed,' one commenter asked. Another user posted an actual EDM track her ex created using a crying voicemail she had sent. 'He cheated, i broke up with him and then he proceeded to make a edm song to a crying voicemail,' she explained in the caption. 'I think you've found a unique experience,' one person commented. 'I'm so sorry this is the funniest thing i've ever seen,' another added. Some users chose to opt out of the trend. 'Could BODY this trend but chose peace,' one TikTok user posted, hinting at some truly damning receipts. Some videos shared as part of the trend are genuinely disturbing, detailing harrowing accounts of emotional and physical abuse. According to the United Nations, over a quarter (27%) of women worldwide, aged between 15 and 49, who have been in a relationship report having experienced some form of physical or sexual violence by an intimate partner. Even Lorde, the unwitting originator of the trend, felt compelled to respond. Earlier this week, she posted a clip shaking her head as the song plays, her face expressing disbelief. The caption reads: 'These messages……' In response to one comment—'girl yes, it's got me scared'—Lorde replied: 'I can't look away.' Another summed up the trend: 'guys you're stressing out lorde.'
Washington Post
13-06-2025
- General
- Washington Post
Carolyn Hax: Will girlfriend's mean mom encroach on their future together?
Dear Carolyn: For a year, I've been dating 'Sylvia.' Sylvia is smart, funny, kind, fits well with my family and friends — she is a bright light and makes me a better person. The BUT is her mom. She demands constant attention and validation, and she is mean. She treats retail and waitstaff rudely and has unreasonable demands. She saw a picture of my sister and said she would be pretty if she weren't so fat (she's not fat!!). Talking about a cousin, she says unprintable things about her sex life. The mom will gaslight Sylvia for the smallest things, or say mean things about her weight, hair, underachieving at her job — and, five seconds later, pull her close and tell her she loves her. Sylvia is blind to her mom's meanness because she isn't willing or ready to see it yet. She excuses all her behavior and says her mom had a tough life. I can limit my time with her mom, but I love Sylvia. What happens if we get married and have kids? I wouldn't want kids influenced by her mom's nastiness. Do people break up because of their parents? I've asked Sylvia to go to therapy, but she says only doomed couples go to therapy before marriage. — Anonymous Anonymous: Not the right question. People break up because one of them chews too loudly. Plus, her 'doomed couples' view is a rigid, mindless, self-defeating response to a fair request from someone who seems pretty convincingly in her corner. So you have decent Sylvia reasons to question your future with Sylvia, before you even get to the mother. And that's before getting to deeply serious reasons: that the abuse from Mom that Sylvia ignores, excuses or doesn't comprehend is the abuse she is at risk, in some form, of carrying forward. Her nonsensical response to therapy is a little green shoot of extremist thinking. Readers with long memories will recall I once dismissed therapy this early in a relationship — so maybe it takes a mindless reflex to know one. I'll share what trained me out of mine, in hopes it can help you with Sylvia; given her intense family dysfunction, your opening her mind to therapeutic care in this small way could be handing her the proverbial file baked into a cake. First, every conversation about relationship health comes back around to trust. If you have conducted yourself as a decent human — meaning, you treat Sylvia's interests as inherently equal to yours vs. as props for your whims — then the good-faith answer to your therapy request, for your partner, is yes. Period. I mean, really. It's 50 minutes with a health professional. You're not insisting she juggle sharp things. Trust mechanisms, alas, tend to be the first casualties of abuse. In that case, couples counseling becomes a no — for good reason, maybe even for Sylvia. But talk about a six-word pitch for individual counseling: to be trust-challenged … and dating. Second, we all bring our stuff to relationships. When it reacts badly with someone else's, that's often a hint to break up. The younger me would advise that; why force it? But now I see how that becomes an easy excuse to hop from person to person, never admitting or fixing your stuff. It is both humbling and motivating to admit you want to get along with someone better than your current skills permit. Why quibble over the timing? So, third, for the Sylvias: 'Doomed' isn't from therapy itself, or admitting the need. It's from minds closed to new information. I hope she's ready to hear you.
