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Gen Z ditches traditional dating rules to not just ‘go through the motions'
Gen Z ditches traditional dating rules to not just ‘go through the motions'

Yahoo

time12-06-2025

  • Entertainment
  • Yahoo

Gen Z ditches traditional dating rules to not just ‘go through the motions'

Dating's latest trend? Total anarchy — and not in the punk rock way. A new report from the sex-positive app Feeld and educator Ruby Rare found that a growing number of Gen Zers are opting out of traditional relationship models and instead diving into something called 'relationship anarchy' — and one in five may be practicing it without even realizing. Coined in 2006 by Swedish writer Andie Nordgren, relationship anarchy — or RA — is a radical, anti-hierarchical, anti-capitalist take on love and connection. As Nordgren noted in her manifesto, it 'questions the idea that love is a limited resource that can only be real if restricted to a couple.' In other words, why should romance get top billing when your BFF, roommate or creative collaborator might fulfill your soul more than a spouse? 'It's a relationship style that is founded on politically anarchic principles. It takes being intentional,' Rare explained in the study. 'You have to examine the relationships you currently have in your life, and reflect and deep dive. Are you just going through the motions?' Feeld's findings show RA devotees report feeling less lonely and more supported — but it's not all communal bliss and pillow talk. 'It's challenging to figure out what your boundaries are,' Rare said. 'But I don't think relationship building should be about shying away from challenge.' Instead of prioritizing sexual exclusivity or 'Disney fairy-tale romance,' RA promotes mutual care across all connections — romantic or not. 'Everyone is taught the rules at a young age: One person in your life is meant to be your everything,' Sam, a 33-year-old gender-fluid music licensing administrator, told Wired in a recent interview. People would feel more fulfilled in their relationships 'if they were able to prioritize others based on what they actually wanted versus what they believe is expected of them.' The goal? Freedom, not perfection. 'A lot of people will tell me, 'Oh, I wish I could be polyamorous or a relationship anarchist, but I just get too jealous,'' Lavvynder said. 'And it's like, well, I get jealous too… It's really f—king hard, actually.' Still, many say it's worth the mess. As Rare puts it: 'Human connection is inherently messy. The better we are at embracing that, the better we are at enjoying our lives.' And for a rising number of romantics, relationship anarchy might just be the escape route. Polyamory — and its close cousin, relationship anarchy — may not just be about love and liberation. It can also be practical.

I'm a straight woman and my husband is a gay man - people always ask us what happens in the bedroom
I'm a straight woman and my husband is a gay man - people always ask us what happens in the bedroom

Daily Mail​

time23-05-2025

  • Entertainment
  • Daily Mail​

I'm a straight woman and my husband is a gay man - people always ask us what happens in the bedroom

A straight woman has opened up about sleeping with her gay husband after revealing that they are trying for a baby together. Samantha Greenstone, 37, and Jacob Hoff, 31, from Los Angeles, first met when they both auditioned for the play Fiddler on the Roof a decade ago. Despite Jacob identifying as gay and Samantha being straight, the pair started to date after experiencing a strong connection with each other that transcends 'plain old sexuality'. The actors - who are monogamous - tied the knot at the end of 2024 and have since attracted many fans who are curious about their bond, especially since divulging that they are trying to start a family. The couple took to their Instagram accounts, where they shared almost 480,000 followers between them, to address the question on everyone's lips - do they sleep together? 'Yes and not just side by side under the covers,' Samantha said, while Jacob added: 'No and we don't just cut a hole in the sheet either.' She responded: 'Nope we do it the good old fashioned way. If you're confused by what that means, then it's not our job to teach you the birds and the bees. That responsibility relies on your parents.' Jacob chimed in and said: 'I know it's mind-bending to a lot of you to be like "Well he's gay, how can he be sleeping with a woman?" This isn't a woman, this is my wife, this is my soulmate, my partner.' 'I am a woman, I know that someone is going to be like "Wait a minute, she's not a woman, is she a man then?" Because you've got to spell things out for people sometimes. 'It's just a matter of saying that this isn't a surface level connection. It's so deep, it's so intimate. It's two people just coming together - two souls coming together. That's it, there's none of that ephemeral beauty nonsense on top of it. Samantha ended the video by describing their love as 'pure, amazing and holy,' and captioned it: 'Since you asked - how else does one try and make a baby?' The video racked up almost one million views and had a mixed response from users as some expressed support for the couple, but others seemed puzzled. One wrote: 'I'm still so confused. So he is bi?' Another penned: 'I'll never get it but that's on me. Love that you answer questions!' A third said: 'You two are both so precious,' and a fourth commented: 'I'm so obsessed with you both.' But Jacob gets frustrated when he sees comments questioning his sexuality, telling The Mirror: 'We get a lot of, 'well how is Jacob ever going to be fulfilled by not being expressing his gayness?' That's where I see a little bit of the bigotry come in, because it's like, 'oh, you think because I'm gay I'm less loyal to a person? The video racked up almost one million views and had a mixed response from users as some expressed support for the couple, but others seemed puzzled 'Just because I'm gay doesn't mean that I would ever be less loyal. In a relationship, you wake up and choose your person every day, and that's the same no matter what dynamic.' They insist that theirs is not a 'lavender marriage' - which is where one partner is heterosexual and the other is covertly homosexual or bisexual and are using the relationship to hide their sexuality - and are monogamous. Samantha told the outlet: 'To us, marriage is a sacred thing, and we are old-fashioned in the sense that we just want to be with one another. We don't want to open the relationship up, we want that traditional family.' Despite identifying as gay, Jacob started dating Samantha in 2017 and the pair got engaged at the end of 2023. Jacob recalled the first time he met his soulmate and said that he first noticed her laugh during their audition, telling the New York Times: 'From the lobby, I heard Samantha's cackle at the end of the song and instantly thought whoever just made that sound is an immaculate human.' After they were both cast in the show, they became closer when rehearsals started and 'never stopped hanging out pretty much every single day after.' However, Samantha noted she was 'living in utter confusion' after realizing her feelings for Hoff were for more than friendship and felt a powerful 'magnetism' towards him. She even went to an energy healer for advice, who claimed the pair 'share a spiritual umbilical cord.' Samantha made the nerve-wracking decision to text Jacob and admit her feelings to him, which he reciprocated but was nervous about. 'I was like, "Oh my goodness. I can't believe she did this,"' Jacob recalled. 'The answer was yes. But then I was scared. I thought, "If I can't make this work physically, it could ruin everything."' 'I am gay,' Jacob explained. 'And as a gay person, you can keep your identity as that even if your relationship doesn't match that.

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