29-04-2025
People scoff at the idea of a ‘grief retreat' – for me, it was a lifeline
I was sitting on a bench hanging from a majestic saman tree in a verdant botanical garden in St Lucia. It was the final day of my Caribbean 'grief retreat', and I had purposely carved out this moment for myself, alone, in a peaceful place.
The resort that surrounded me – adults-only StolenTime St Lucia – was, until recently, known as 'Rendezvous', a honeymoon resort near Castries, the capital, which had been drawing happy newlyweds since 1966.
Now renamed, it has launched a series of themed month-long programmes geared not towards romance, but health, wellbeing and relaxation.
Collaborating with Annalie Howling – a British life and performance coach who specialises in overcoming trauma – the resort looks to curate a 'grief retreat' for travellers seeking solace, whether after a bereavement, divorce, job loss or even the advent of an empty nest.
It caters to a real need: according to the UK Commission on Bereavement, 39 per cent of bereaved people reported difficulties in getting support from friends or family.
StolenTime's sister property, The Body Holiday, is a sporty resort in the north of the island geared towards active types.
StolenTime is a gentler, calmer place, and in this way it is positioning itself to welcome not only newlyweds, but also a slice of The White Lotus-style wellness industry, worth $800 billion globally.
Grief retreats, recently touted as one of 2025's top upcoming travel trends, are a growing subdivision of this lucrative market.
According to a report by the Ecole hôtelière de Lausanne (EHL), a renowned Swiss hospitality business and hotel management school, wellness-oriented guests 'spend more money than other travellers, book longer stays and choose higher-tier accommodations.'
High price-tags can mean wellbeing trends are treated with cynicism – as eye-wateringly expensive Maldivian 'wellbeing island' Joali Being was when it recently featured in Monica Galetti and Rob Rinder's Amazing Hotels: Life Behind The Lobby.
But when the intention is one of benevolence, support and altruism, it's tough to find fault with the concept.
At StolenTime, the world-weary can enjoy cocktails at the swim-up bar after a session of aqua aerobics, pickleball, catamaran sailing, a rainforest hike with views of the Piton mountains, or a dip in the mud baths next to St Lucia's bubbling volcanic sulphur springs.
If that all sounds too demanding, even slower-paced activities include jewellery making, Pilates, and tai chi at the oceanfront beach studio, 'sip and paint' on the terrace, toes-in-the-sand casual dining, and serene massages in the secluded Water Garden spa.
Guests can craft an itinerary to suit their needs, combining wellness activities at the resort with other island experiences – a Rhythm of Rum tour, chocolate making, or scuba diving excursions, for example – and there are sundowners and evening entertainment, too. During my visit, guests were treated to a performance from a talented St Lucian pianist, a tasting in the champagne bar, and a drum show alongside a torch-lit barbecue on the beach.
Working through a bereavement of my own, I was able to appreciate the very real benefits of StolenTime's approach first-hand. After a walk along the two-mile stretch of beach that the resort overlooks, followed by a doze in a quiet cabana next to the hotel's lazy river, I was left with a much-needed sense of plenitude.
Equally, snorkelling at the reef – the complexities of reality edged out by the distractions of a beautiful underwater world – provided a balm-like distraction.
The activity co-ordinators at StolenTime were convivial and expert, striking a balance by engaging warmly with their guests without ever encroaching on the need for time alone.
I especially relished spending time in the beautiful gardens, alive with hummingbirds, cannonball flowers, ginger lilies, coco-plum and red-hot cat's tails (Acalypha hispida – also known as 'dreadlocks').
I felt nourished by the abundance of St Lucian produce grown on the island's volcanic soil, and gorged on the fresh mauby, carambola (star fruit), mangoes and plantain.
The grief programmes Howling has developed were initially inspired, she explained to me, by a story she'd heard when visiting previously. For many years, a woman had come to the resort every summer with her husband. On one visit, staff at the hotel noticed her husband seemed unwell.
They were so surprised when they did not receive her regular booking the following year that they called to check on her, and discovered her husband had since died. It seemed logical, although she was now a single widow, to welcome her to return to the place where she had created so many special memories – and to make it known that others could do the same.
Travel can, in itself, be a powerful tool for healing: being somewhere entirely different from the everyday can help to recalibrate when the everyday has been irrevocably altered. It's why well-meaning friends might suggest a holiday.
'Often, when people are grieving, they get to a point where they don't want to feel they are 'burdening' those around them,' Howling told me. And this is where resorts such as StolenTime are so invaluable – holding out a lifeline and inviting guests to rest, rejuvenate and disconnect.
'It's a brave step to travel after any kind of loss,' said Howling. 'Here, you feel supported by the amenities, the people around you and by the natural environment.'
Of course, there is no quick fix – nothing can take grief away. And yet, the warm embrace of a sunny garden by the Caribbean sea can certainly help to make the world feel a little brighter.
And when you are languishing in the darkness of deep grief, it's bright spots like these that are crucial in lighting the way back to a better place.
Essentials
British Airways flies direct from London to St Lucia from £570 return. A transfer will then take you the hour and a half's journey to StolenTime, which has rooms from $585/£440 (single occupancy) and $1,009/£758 (double occupancy) per night on an all-inclusive basis, including various fitness activities, food and beverages, personal instruction available for group sports, exercise classes, motorised and non-motorised water sports, and nightly entertainment.
The George F L Charles Airport in Castries handles inter-island flights serviced by lighter aircraft and helicopters, and is a five-minute drive from StolenTime.
Six more peaceful 'grief retreats'
Mending Hearts
Gilly Da Silva runs Mending Hearts divorce and grief retreats for men and women of all ages and circumstances, designed to rebuild confidence and rejuvenate spirits – especially for those who are navigating divorce, a difficult breakup, or coping with bereavement. Read The Telegraph's interview with her here. The next retreat is in Marrakech, May 9-15.
Preidlhof, Italy
At Preidlhof spa in Naturno in South Tyrol, holistic coaches Stefano Battaglia and Patrizia Bortolin blend physical therapies with meditation, water-healing massage and other embodiment practices to help guests make peace with the past and make space for a fresh start. Rooms from £560 a night.
Resurface Surf Therapy
In Morocco and the UK, psychologist Josh Dickson combines surfing with one-on-one therapy during evidence-based surf-therapy programmes combined with an emphasis on social connection. From May 9 to May 12, Dickson will be running a three-day Working with Grief retreat at Holwell Holistic Retreat in Barnstaple, Devon. From £1,090 per person, it combines trauma-sensitive practices, surfing and restorative workshops. The next Resurface Morocco retreat in Tamraght, Morocco, runs from May 31-June 7, and costs from £1,750 per person.
Paço da Glória, Portugal
This retreat at an 18th-century castle in Portugal is run by Rebecca Illing – a practising end-of-life doula as well as a hotelier. Here, guests are invited to contemplate mortality in a so-called 'Death Garden'. Illing, who was inspired to help others navigate loss after the death of her brother, hopes to curate a space where 'grief is welcomed, and death isn't taboo'.
Healing Heart Retreat
Retreats at The Nest, a woodland hideaway in Cornwall, offer two, three or four night programmes for anyone suffering grief or loss. Created by founder Moya Salde, the programmes feature intuitive walk-and-talk coaching, meditation, sea swimming and breathwork. Available all year from £2,595 per person for two nights, including accommodation, meals, activities, a massage and airport or rail transfers.
The British Pilgrimage Trust
The British Pilgrimage Trust, co-founded by Dr Guy Hayward, is organising a bring-your-own-beliefs bereavement pilgrimage in the Sussex countryside (via Lewes Priory and Firle Beacon) for bereaved parents, covering 8-10 miles per day from May 30-June 1. 'In Britain, we don't really have many grief traditions for long-term bereavement. Pilgrimage may be an answer,' says Hayward.
Grief Alchemy
So-called 'griefluencer' Nici Harrison – who lost her mother Lizzie in 2016 and calls her work 'grief tending' – runs five-day retreats in Cornwall, Somerset and Portugal. The retreats include therapeutic writing, nervous system workshops and sharing circles, alongside yoga and organic meals.
