19 hours ago
Bossa nova puts an end to unease created by an innocent relationship question
The event was not due to start until 8pm, but Shuhao was so worried about finding a seat that it was only 6.30pm when we walked down the steps into a basement near the Longfu Temple. For the next hour we were alone apart from the barman, the owner and two women who moved to and fro taking pictures of one another.
For almost a decade, this small space hosted film screenings, exhibitions, DJs and live bands, with an emphasis on improvisation. At Say Something, one of the most popular weekly events, those present were invited to 'read something aloud, tell a story, say something' – with no restrictions on their choice of material.
'You could read anything. Some people just read something like the phone book,' Shuhao said. 'There was no judgment. But you were supposed to think about the feelings of the others there too.'
The last time he was there, the place was so full he had to go up to the street for air from time to time. But now the management had announced that 'due to the contract expiring + economic downturn + limited energy' it was closing down.
READ MORE
Shuhao and I were there for what was due to be the closing event, another regular feature called Open Decks, where everyone was invited to play the music of their choice for 30 minutes. In keeping with the venue's spirit, which one regular visitor described as 'free but not unbridled', the choices tended to be individual but at least tolerable for most of the others present.
While we waited for the show to begin, Shuhao brought me up to date about his life as a student of English literature at one of Beijing's top universities. He was planning to move for his master's degree to Peking University, the most prestigious of all, and was preparing for an entrance examination.
'The teachers aren't better there but the students are,' he said.
Some of his friends were thinking about going abroad for their master's degree but he felt that, since he had chosen to study something that would never make him rich, he should not ask his parents to pay too much for it.
He was hoping to go abroad for his PhD, aiming for one of the leading American universities where funding for doctoral students can be generous. I was surprised that he would consider going to the
United States
in the current climate, particularly after the
threats to revoke Chinese students' visas
made as part of Donald Trump's trade war.
The last time we met he had mentioned a girlfriend and I asked, gently I thought, if she was still in the picture. He said she was, but then he looked troubled and a few minutes later he returned to the subject
'It's better than a real war. And he'll be gone by then,' Shuhao said.
As they head into their final year as undergraduates, his friends and classmates are also thinking about their future. Some have ambitions for high political office and are planning a route through the system, while others want to make money and are enrolling in MBA courses.
Shuhao's passion is for writing songs and singing in a band, but he has no plan to make a career out of it – and neither do most of his creative friends.
'Most of them want to get a job in the civil service, where they finish work at the same time every day and they have the rest of the time for music or writing or whatever they want,' he said.
'I prefer the approach of Wallace Stevens or TS Eliot to Byron or Shelley.'
Shuhao is not planning to work in an insurance company like Stevens or in a bank like Eliot, but he is becoming more modest and restrained in his manner and appearance in recent months. His once shoulder-length hair has become a short crop and he has swapped the black metalhead T-shirts and jeans for a white shirt and black trousers.
The last time we met he had mentioned a girlfriend and I asked, gently I thought, if she was still in the picture. He said she was, but then he looked troubled and a few minutes later he returned to the subject.
'I'm sorry, I'm really shocked by that question,' he said. 'We don't post pictures of ourselves on WeChat all the time. We take pictures but we don't post them. We are in a committed relationship and we have plans for the future.'
I felt old suddenly and poisoned by experience. An unease fell between us as I tried to assure him that I wasn't casting doubt on anything. I was babbling about the couples I knew who had met in college and remained happily together in old age, when the first DJ put a stop to the conversation.
His gentle mix of bossa nova and French pop songs from the 1960s gave Shuhao and me something to smile about together and I stayed for another two sessions. He stayed behind but we exchanged a few messages on my way home as he updated me on the music and the crowd, with a final text an hour later.
'Everyone's standing up and grooving,' he said.
