Donna Vickroy: Anger's not the answer in these days of turmoil; try a little kindness and do something positive
In a world of hate and cruelty, of murder and war mongering, of fear and uncertainty, of kings and tyrants, is it even possible to still be your old peace-loving self?
Last weekend was a rollercoaster of emotion. The murders of state officials in Minnesota, the massive 'No Kings' protests, the underwhelming military parade. Lows, highs, in betweens. Our emotions were constantly in play.
Increasingly, it seems we never get a break on this crazy train.
These are tough times for people who strive for quiet, easy living.
How long can we endure so much chaos? Will our communities survive this deep divisiveness? How many relationships will be torn asunder? Will this country ever truly be the UNITED States of America?
And then, in a clearing where the smoke of gunfire still smolders, we see a light, a warm, embracing light. It reaches out and bear hugs us in love and kindness.
It gives us just what we need.
Direction.
So many of us have spent these last few months running and thither from bad news to more bad news, from chaos to bedlam, from disbelief to shock.
Unsettled has become our lifestyle. Scared has become our retort to the simple, 'How are you?'
And through it all, through the destruction of agencies, through the collapse of status quo, through the disregard for law and customs and regulations and protocol, through the dismantling of decorum and civility, through the murder of public servants, we wonder what can we, regular folks, do to keep ourselves from becoming the very thing we despise — cruel?
Sure, we can come together and protest. We can lift our voices. We can stand together.
And, boy, does it feel good to connect with like-minded people in the name of peace and justice.
But as soon as we begin to bask in the glow of a massive peaceful mobilization, the beating of war drums breaks our kumbaya.
It never lets up.
We are tired of being battered, tired of being angry, tired of shouting back.
And, yet, is there an alternative?
From the mouths of babes, comes a suggestion.
From Sophie and Colin Hortman, the children of Minnesota state Rep. Melissa Hortman and her husband Mark, come powerful words of wisdom, reminding all of us that, in times of turmoil, when the world seems on the brink of an emotional breakdown, small acts of kindness can help balance the universe.
Just a few days after their parents and beloved dog Gilbert were maliciously gunned down in their home during the early hours of June 14, Sophie and Colin have extended to America a path back to civility.
'We are devastated and heartbroken at the loss of our parents, Melissa and Mark. They were the bright lights at the center of our lives, and we can't believe they are gone. Their love for us was boundless. We miss them so much.'
These little lambs, immersed in horror and grief, are thinking of others.
They thank the public for the outpouring of love and law enforcement for the swift action 'that saved others and for the coordination across communities that led to the arrest of the man who murdered our parents.'
And then there's a request for you and me and all who have been saddened or angered or somehow changed by the actions of this new world order. They don't ask for flowers or donations to a cause. They don't ask for retribution.
They simply ask that you pay your respects to their dedicated parents by carrying on their mission of kindness and appreciation.
'Our parents touched so many lives, and they leave behind an incredible legacy of dedication to their community that will live on in us, their friends, their colleagues and coworkers, and every single person who knew and loved them.
'If you would like to honor the memory of Mark and Melissa, please consider the following:
Every single thing on this list is easy. Every single thing on this list has far-reaching consequences.
In short, when you are hurt by the actions of others, resist the temptation to inflict more hurt. Sure, work for change, strive for a better world, but don't kick the dog in the meantime because he's there and will take it.
The children end with: 'Hope and resilience are the enemy of fear. Our parents lived their lives with immense dedication to their fellow humans. This tragedy must become a moment for us to come together. Hold your loved ones a little closer. Love your neighbors. Treat each other with kindness and respect. The best way to honor our parents' memory is to do something, whether big or small, to make our community just a little better for someone else.'
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