‘I just wanted to cry' – Alvaro Morata reveals ‘self-destructive' spell and considered faking injury to skip tournament
ALVARO MORATA contemplated faking an injury to avoid playing at Euro 2024.
The Spain striker - who captained his country to glory by beating England - bravely opened up on feeling "depressed" and "mentally broken" during his career.
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The revelations are made in a new tell-all documentary called Morata: They Don't Know Who I Am, which details the psychological difficulties he has faced.
He named Atletico Madrid's defeat to Borussia Dortmund in their Champions League quarter-final in April 2024 as a particular low point.
Morata, 32, said: "You start to feel many things in your body and you don't know why or how.
"Your legs hurt. Your chest closes up. You can't breathe. I was afraid of going to sleep and not waking up. I was afraid of everything."
After fumbling a one-on-one with Dortmund goalkeeper Gregor Kobel early in the second leg in Germany, Morata claims he was unable to focus on the game because he kept mentally reliving the opportunity.
He said: "I was not able to follow the ball.
"We were not losing the game, but in your head, you had blown the chance to reach a Champions League final with Atletico.
"When the game was over, I stayed a long time alone in the dressing room. I just wanted to cry. From there, it all began."
In the documentary, Morata claims that he "had a very bad time" during his challenging time as a Chelsea player from 2017 to 2019.
And he claims the problems escalated after the former Real Madrid academy graduate joined city rivals Atletico.
Morata said: "I had many horrible, self-destructive thoughts.
"It passed through my head to fake an injury, so I would not have to go [to the Euros]."
Morata informed Spain's doctor, Oscar Celada, on the phone that he was unable to attend the tournament.
Celada arranged for Morata to talk to former international team-mate Andres Iniesta, who battled depression during his playing career when his close friend and team-mate Dani Jarque passed away in 2009.
Morata was assisted by Iniesta in seeing that he could overcome his issues by contributing well to Spain at the Euros in Germany.
In the documentary, Spain head coach Luis de la Fuente also claims that he gave Morata something to strive for by telling him that "the team needed him."
The programme shows some of Morata's sessions with his psychiatrist, Pilar de Castro-Manglano, in between Euros matches.
De Castro-Manglano said: "Alvaro is currently undergoing repair.
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"It's like a ligament had broken, and you have to learn to walk again, to deal with the difficulties of life in a healthy way. Learning to manage life is difficult, even more in elite people who live in the public eye."
Throughout his lengthy international career, the enigmatic striker, currently applying his trade at Galatasaray, has frequently been lambasted for his performances by media and fans.
Morata said: "Is it worth playing for Spain if everywhere I go with my family, there are unpleasant incidents, with people insulting you and mocking you?
'If you go to stadiums, wearing the Spain jersey, and fans whistle you and abuse you. It's not worth it.
"There are many Spain fans who support me, but also many others who don't want me here. But if I retire from international football, they will win."
Since making his international debut in 2014, Morata has scored 37 goals in 86 games for Spain.
Most recently, he missed the decisive penalty kick as Spain lost to Portugal in a shootout in the Nations League final.
He made a suggestion about leaving the international game after the final whistle.
He said: "I feel sorry for my teammates, but that's part of life.
"I thank the coach for his words. The penalty? I took it badly, I could have done better, but there's nothing I can do about it.
Speaking on his possible retirement, Morata added: "I'm only thinking about what happened today, but it's possible I won't be back in September."
You're Not Alone
EVERY 90 minutes in the UK a life is lost to suicide
It doesn't discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society – from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers.
It's the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes.
And men are three times more likely to take their own life than women.
Yet it's rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice, now.
That is why The Sun launched the You're Not Alone campaign.
The aim is that by sharing practical advice, raising awareness and breaking down the barriers people face when talking about their mental health, we can all do our bit to help save lives.
Let's all vow to ask for help when we need it, and listen out for others… You're Not Alone.
If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support:
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