Trump says we have too many non-working holidays. He's right: Rest is for LOSERS!
Like most Americans, I cannot stand work holidays. I want to be in the office, making America great again by working tirelessly for a corporation that squeezes maximum profit out of me.
If there's one thing hardworking Americans who support President Donald Trump can agree on, it's that we're not working hard enough and desperately need to eradicate radical Marxist concepts like 'days off' and 'holidays.'
That's why I was so proud to read the MAGA president's social-media post – which was totally coincidentally sent on Juneteenth, a day that celebrates the end of slavery – calling for a sharp reduction in rest:
'Too many non-working holidays in America. It is costing our Country $BILLIONS OF DOLLARS to keep all of these businesses closed. The workers don't want it either! Soon we'll end up having a holiday for every once working day of the year. It must change if we are going to, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!'
Exactly. Like most Americans, I cannot stand work holidays. I want to be in the office, making America great again by working tirelessly for a corporation that squeezes maximum profit out of me as I slowly drift apart from my family. IT'S IN THE BILL OF RIGHTS, PEOPLE!
Trump treated Juneteenth like a 'DEI program' he wants to cut
Now some libs out there will suggest Trump intentionally posted about getting rid of holidays on Juneteenth because he's doing everything in his power to strip the federal government of anything that suggests non-white people exist and thinks acknowledging the end of slavery is leftist DEI thinking. And some will note that Trump recently issued presidential proclamations honoring Flag Day, National Flag Week and Father's Day while completing ignoring Juneteenth and making it a regular work day at the White House.
How dare liberals connect numerous dots that form a straight line and logically conclude that President Trump's actions reflect how he feels. It sounds like they have too much time on their hands, which is why we desperately need to eliminate work holidays and give people less time to think.
Opinion: From massive protests to a puny parade, America really let Donald Trump down
Trump knows Americans just want to work. And work and work and work.
America proudly has the second-lowest number of paid vacation days and the fewest paid leave days of any nation on the planet, and I can't think of a single patriot who would welcome more time off.
As Trump said in his post, 'The workers don't want it either!' Damn straight. If there's one person qualified to know what workers want, it's a billionaire who spends huge amounts of time selflessly golfing so that golf-club employees and the people who protect him can work more.
Opinion: Trump's parade didn't make him feel tough. Maybe a war with Iran will?
Trump must immediately do away with ALL federal holidays
Because I know President Trump doesn't have a prejudiced bone in his body, and to demonstrate that he wasn't singling out Juneteenth as an unworthy holiday, I'm sure he'll take quick action to eliminate all paid federal holidays, including the Fourth of July, Columbus Day, Christmas and Washington's Birthday. Because, as Trump wrote, 'It is costing our Country $BILLIONS OF DOLLARS to keep all of these businesses closed.'
We MAGA Americans want to work, work, work, and not be burdened by the socialist concept of paid days off. So I'm sure we can all get behind this new slogan, soon to be available on red hats everywhere: 'MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN – WORK UNTIL DEATH!'
Follow USA TODAY columnist Rex Huppke on Bluesky at @rexhuppke.bsky.social and on Facebook at facebook.com/RexIsAJerk
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